In Pursuit of Wholeness
Let's take a moment to get real honest with each other...
Much of our pain, shame, fear and trauma is rooted in feeling unloved and unwanted.
We internalize what has been done to us and said about us, many times believing it was our fault
— like there’s something wrong with us or that we deserved the treatment we received.
Deep down, in the recesses of our heart we know that isn’t true and yet, we uncontinuously ACT as if it is.
We isolate to self protect, resolve to stay small and remain hidden in the shadows so we don’t get hurt again -- or take up too much space.
We stop speaking up
We stop showing up
We stop sharing our gifts
We stop feeling
We become numb
And in meantime, we stop living life — sometimes even loosing the desire to live it all together.
With the help of a trusted mentor, I discovered that my soul had been living in limbo for many years....
Not choose life.
Neither choosing death.
I was simply existing.
I didn’t know it at the time, but I was a shell of what I could be.
A human with only a fraction of her souls essence embodied and shining through.
These are difficult moments to sit in.
But Life, in it's loving pursuit of our Wholeness, wills us to face it when they come and not run.
To some degree, last year felt like a free-fall.
A Great Pause, gifting us the opportunity to sit, rest and dream a new dream -- for ourselves and this world.
But this year feels different.
More akin to boot strapping (shadow) work
-- of ripping out old structures that no longer serve us and laying new foundations that will nurture and nourish humanity for decades to come.
Can you feel it?
But this isn't easy work!
NOT for the faint of heart.
For me, anger has been surfacing — and it’s asking a lot.
With curiosity and patience, I’ve chosen to honour these difficult emotions and allow them to teach me…
to reveal what’s hidden below the surface and needs attention.
Boundaries I haven’t honoured.
Injustice I haven’t spoken out about.
Judgement I’ve heaped upon myself and others.
Expectations I need to surrender.
I’m choosing to cultivate a healthy relationship with anger — an emotion that for years I ignored (suppressed), squashed down (repressed) and acted out of (unconscious denial), in unhealthily ways.
It’s slow, deep work that requires all of me at times
— my attention, forgiveness and love.
But I know it’s worth it.
On the other side, I will re-claim more of my personal power, divine creativity and passionate purpose.
And so can you.
It’s time to build something NEW!
We’ve been so addicted to fast progress and temporary pleasures in this lifetime, that going back to the basics can feel depressing — threatening even.
We need to continually access fresh perspective and willpower to propel us forward, from where we are to where you want to be.
To find your fuel, pay attention to what lights you up!
Observe what activities make you feel the most happy, content and at ease.
Notice who’s presence you feel alive in and wish to remain with for a time.
Witness what groups or communities make you feel safe and supported enough to be honest.
Acknowledge when and where you access hope, strength and courage to KEEP GOING.
For me it’s mediation, breath work and my yoga practice.
And the spaces I show up to teach them, as well as, receive as a student.
What and where is it for you?
Commit to showing up regularly.. at least 3-4x / week if you want results.
I do it everyday.
Not without conscious effort, either!
There are many days I don't feel like it and my schedule needs re-working.
But I know every minute I invest reaps dividends far greater than I imagine.
In case you need a jumping off point, I’ve gathered a few resources for you below.
It's my great honour to meet you on this path to co-create a New Earth Reality!
In Love and Devotion to your Highest Self,
Kailey